Often times after a loved one of ours dies, we feel so lost. It seems like life is moving on without us, as if we are stuck in a different time. For those who have had someone you love die, it seems like everyone forgets that even though time has passed, you are still struggling just to breathe.
When we have someone die close to us, all we need is presence of people. There are no words needed. Only a hug, a smile, a presentness of those who we know that care about us. This is also what we need days, weeks, months, even years to come. We need to remember. We need others to remember. We need to talk about that person we loved. We need to be heard.
I remember when my daddy died, the best thing someone did for me at his visitation was just to walk in, see me, smile, and hold me for a little bit. No words were needed.
So the next time you go to a funeral, just be there. It’s okay to say you’re sorry, but it isn’t needed. But especially remember those hurting in the days that follow the funeral. Those will be some of the hardest ones. All those ‘firsts’ that have to happen without them. Send them a card. Let them know you are still praying and remembering.
Life goes on.
Thomas Grimes says
When my Dad passed away, I was in Louisville at work. I was dreading the drive to Nashville. On my way there I listened to the radio. I kept thinking ‘why hasn’t the announcement, that my Dad had died, been on the radio?!’ Everyone is acting like everything’s okay and normal. But as you said Life Goes On.
I always look forward to being with my church family in Nashville. I love to hear stories about Dad. I love to hear that people miss him. That they miss his hugs, or his visits when they’re in the hospital. His smile or the way he laughs when he tells a joke. And even though Life Goes On, I still have the great memories of my Dad & how much he loved his family & that keeps me going. Thanks Laurel!